today was a good shopping trip. managed to buy a huge set of headphones 
and 2 christian-themed tees.
will have to cease the shopping for a very long time, may i add.
anyway, paid a visit to ICON @ bugis. heard of it before but never really committed it to memory until ros said she wanted to buy a new tee. so it was off to Little Lamb’s store and it was located at ICON. didn’t have to think much to find the building cos the moment we walked out of the main building, i saw breadtalk and we jaywalked across(shhh!).
anyway that building has 6 storeys. amazing huh. best part is that it is fully air-conditioned! my kind of place! cos i tend to pespire rather easily. lol. saw an ex-schoolmate(SBM) who stared at us rather viciously for some strange reason. funny, considering the fact i’ve never spoken to said person before(or known on a personal basis). hmm.
was talking to a friend online and she was moping about the loss of her ex-boyfriend(she allowed me to write about it here provided i don’t include her identity). he dumped her around this time of the year for her best friend. tough luck, eh? i know diehard romantics will be all aghast and wonder why a guy could be so heartless as to pull of such a stunt nearing V-day but lets all be pragmatic okay? and every year, around this time, she gets kinda down in the dumps. and i always tell her the same thing. its not worth it to be this upset over a guy. cos if you are ever looking to place hope on a fellow human being, you’ll be crushed.
alas, she is unable to find it in her heart to actually listen to me and i don’t blame her the slightest bit. its easiest to dole out advice as the third party(onlooker) but when it comes to receiving harsh yet perfectly true criticism, even when cushioned by a concerned friend, it never is easy and it never will be.
i myself am guilty of not being able to listen to well-meaning advice.
but i also don’t like it when people criticize not for the sake of encouraging you, but rather to bring you down. doesn’t that make you feel lousy?
however, is there a standard way of advising people without making them feel bad about themselves?
there are 10 guidelines(not in order)
1) Pray before talking
2) Think really carefully(are any of my words too strong? is it straightforward?)
3) Try to recall how your friend reacts to similar advice(like did he/she react strongly)
4) Correct body language (actions like cross-armed means stubborness)
5) Speak in a gentle tone (softer please)
6) Do it in private and not embarass the person(how would you like it?)
7) Choose a nice happy time to tell(receptiveness goes up in happiness)
Phrase it in a way you yourself might like to hear it
9) Assure the person that you’re not bent on judgement, that you merely want to help
10) Stay calm in all circumstances, even if friend recoils in shock and disgust.
i dont claim all these to be MY suggestions, most of them i’ve heard from sermons(most recently one by DSP Joe Ong and his wife Debbie). and yeah, i find them to be pretty useful. not that i’m really cautious and stick to those guidelines religiously, but they do come in handy when the situation gets sticky eh.
G.E.M.S - My Foot Arhh!!!
Saturday, July 22nd, 2006i’m sure singaporeans know what GEMS stands for. Go (the) Extra Mile (for) Service.
customer service personnel are all encouraged to be nice to customers and sometimes maybe even go out of their way to meet the customer’s needs. hey, they even have some programme on tv about GEMS now(hosted by ng hui and some guy).
so here’s the scoop. i’ve been shopping around for a reasonably nice dress for my sister’s nuptials. and like most singaporeans(or maybe its just me), i dress super casually, sometimes even on the sloppy side. but sunday is my nice-dress-up day, it being the Sabbath day and showing respect to God in church and all.
ah, i’ve digressed.
so i’ve been to marina square,suntec and stamford. so as NOT to be totally insulting and obvious(also dunwanna set myself up for comprains), i shall not say which outlet i went to for every story, ok?
so let’s go to outlet A. there was only 1 salesgirl attending to the shop. just as well, there were not many customers. so it being my first time selecting dresses and with an equally blur friend, i was quite indecisive lah. the salesgirl was not helpful at all, bordering on the rude side. when i asked her for a simple dress appropriate for church weddings and said i didn’t want a white dress( only the bride can be in white mah), she snapped at me “I don’t know your taste lah! I only have these few dresses!” and she chucked a white dress at me. okaaaaye. maybe it didn’t help i was in a polo tee and denim skirt.
outlet B was no better. i was in dress sandals, jeans and t-shirt. the salespeople didn’t even look at me. i browsed through all the racks in the shop but there was nary a glance. i caught one girl staring at me ’sideways’. oh yeah. all the whilst when i was in the shop with my friends, they were busy talking to themselves. wah lau….
outlet C was puzzling. i went inside, in polo tee and jeans, she smiled at me but stayed put at the other end of the shop. i talked in a rather loud conversational voice to my friend about how nice the dresses were, but not once did the lady show any signs of even walking towards me. her associate came out of the back to talk to her and even gestured towards me but there was still no movement on her part. hmm.
so what? should i have gone up to them and asked for help? was it wrong of me to wait for assistance? or were they snubbing me because of my attire and age?
i don’t know, really. at first i wondered why so many singaporeans were so cynical about the GEMS and 4 million smiles campaigns. now i kinda see the light. most of us just don’t know how to ’automatically’ be nice.
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